"Billy where is your homework?"
"im sorry Ms. Klein my dog- *sees dog in the window make a throat cutting motion* -gone cat ate it”
like a month ago this lady came into my health class and talked about internet safety and she said the government has access to all of our snapchats we send and i was really happy because the government owns probably over 500 pictures of my double chin i dont know what else she said because i fell asleep
"did u dye ur hair red" ummm no its black cherry burgundy brown with an auburn undertone?? duh
Iain Thomas, I Wrote This For You (via dylinquent)
how do people control their emotions like wtf
for those not getting the V or the D, happy alentines ay
my mom was carrying her ipad and a piece of pizza but she stumbled and dropped her ipad on the floor but held tight to her pizza and i’m so glad i know where my priorities come from